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Surviving Christmas

Although Christmas is meant to be a happy and joyful time, this isn’t how everyone feels at this time of the year. Christmas can be a stressful and depressing time for many people. Today, Dr Rachel was on ABC Radio Brisbane discussing tips for surviving Christmas. Click to listen.

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Insomnia, Anxiety, and The Sleep Book: A Teenager’s Firsthand Experience

Our latest blog is a guest post from Alice, the 14 year-old daughter of NBP Director, Rachel Hannam. Alice just finished reading “The Sleep Book” by Dr Guy Meadows. It really helped her overcome her sleep anxiety and insomnia. This is her experience as a teenage sufferer. (She’d love some feedback in the comments 🙂

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The Superpower of Emotional Regulation

Emotional regulation is a superpower. Whilst I was growing up, and even now as an adult, I found the X-Men Marvel characters really appealing. I mean what teenager doesn’t know the feeling of being weird, judged or like an outsider? How awesome it was to escape into a world where I could imagine having superpowers! Now I see…

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How to Give Empathy

I want to be a more empathic person. But when I try to give empathy, I don’t really know how. I end up giving sympathy. Or I ask questions and give suggestions, leading to conflict. How do I give empathy to my partner or my children without ending up in an argument or feeling rather disconnected and helpless? I need some tips….

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How Do I Forgive Him?

“People talk about forgiveness, but I am too full of hurt and resentment. Since doing couples counselling, we are better at communicating. I want to work it out, but I haven’t forgiven him yet. How do I let go of the past and forgive?” So, start by asking yourself what happens when you don’t forgive. If it’s only good things, then don’t forgive! But, more likely, you are asking this because you want out of the mental suffering that non-forgiveness creates…

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My Trauma Story: Integration v Shame

In case you missed it or aren’t on Facebook, I posted a video yesterday about my own trauma story (see below). Actually, just one piece of my story that came back to me after 20 years. I was inspired because many survivors of trauma who I meet are still carrying around feelings of shame. Which is understandable, since shock and trauma can leave us disoriented, frozen, fearful, and ashamed. But I believe in the power of stories to…

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The Stress Myth and How Lobsters Grow

The myth that stress is bad for us still abounds. I personally think toxic shame is much worse. But stress in all forms, such as fear, worry, discomfort and anxiety, is part of life. So long as we are not ignoring high levels of chronic stress, stress is important and helpful. At any rate, stress is inevitable. So, we need to adopt a friendly attitude towards stress and to build our capacity to handle it. So how do we do that?

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Five Happiness Killers

Today I was invited onto ABC Radio in Brisbane to discuss happiness and “Happiness Killers”. A great deal of our thinking and behaviours as human beings create our suffering states, such as powerlessness, resentment, anger, exhaustion, anxiety, jealousy, depression and disappointment. This is my take on the term ‘happiness killers’. Below are the five Happiness Killers I spoke about at the ABC today.

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Lots of Nonviolent Communication Resources

Last Saturday I ran a short but successful workshop at the Solstice Festival at Northey Street City Farm on Nonviolent Communication or NVC. I got lots of messages afterwards and I was reminded that lots of people have lots of interest in this topic. So, I thought I would compile a bunch of links for you for future reference to NVC courses and resources (online + face-to-face).

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Workshop with Rachel on Nonviolent Communication June 23, 2018

If you have no plans this Saturday June 23, come down to Northey Street City Farm in Windsor to the Winter Solstice Festival and join this free workshop with Dr Rachel Hannam from 2pm-3pm at the FairShare Tent to learn about nonviolent communication or NVC.

NVC helps us to bypass blame and judgement, and connect with feelings and needs. Here is a link to the…

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It Is Not The Critic Who Counts

For many people, lack of self-confidence comes form having a harsh inner critic. How do you manage a harsh inner critic? Or harsh critics around you? Working on your own life and mind is the key to accepting yourself as you are and letting go of those criticisms.

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Feeling Tight? Sigh Three Times

When you are tense, your breathing is tight. Three Sighs is the most time-efficient meditation you will ever do. It’s very short – maybe 30 seconds long – but you can change your state of body and mind markedly in that time.

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How to Stop Struggling With Yourself: Develop the Observing Self

The Unexamined Life is Not Worth Living – Socrates We humans have a unique ability that rarely gets talked about in this culture. It’s the ability to observe our own inner experiences as if an internal witness was privy to them. In other words, to engage the ‘observing self’. Most children and young people are not […]

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We are all control freaks!

Set yourself free by recognising this one tendency we all share and how it can go awry. Life is to be lived, not controlled. Like a surfer in the waves, we need to respond to life, not stress ourselves managing and controlling it all.

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4 Steps to Self-Empathy: Get Calm and Clear

Often I use this process with clients who are stuck to a sticky thought and want to get unstuck! We all have sticky thoughts; intrusive or compulsive mental stories we automatically tell ourselves when stressed that can loop endlessly in our heads. The sticky thought is almost always a judgement, either of the self or […]

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