Honeymoon Disappointment

Honeymoon Disappointment
Every bride has her own idea of a romantic honeymoon but not every dream will be fulfilled.

I’m a blushing bride recently married to a man I love with all my heart. He’s handsome, rich and talented. He also has a quick temper, but that’s not what really concerns me. I’m more worried about our honeymoon. As a man of some means, I expected him to sweep me off my feet – Venice, Paris, Vanuatu would have done. Instead, we traipsed around Queensland country towns, staying in motels and eating at service stations and fast food joints. We had fun, but I’m wondering if I shouldn’t feel entitled to something more? Or am I being selfish?

Could he also be famous? That would explain your ordinary holiday. Many celebrities like nothing more than being able to act normal – the very thing that they cannot have.

Look at Russell Crowe. Although he had the big, splashy wedding with the purpose-built cathedral, he didn’t want to spend his honeymoon in ostentatious luxury. While the public and the media assumed he was tucked away in secluded opulence, he saw an opportunity, the chance to have a normal, low-key holiday. What he really wanted was the ordinary, ocker trip where he’d remain unrecognised – a honeymoon; in fact, very similar to the one you describe. Of course, he failed. The media discovered them and he and his bride had to run off to a secure, hideaway island.

So if your new husband has fame, you should be very pleased that you managed to have a plain holiday – eating in fast food joints and staying in modest motels. It is likely to be the last such holiday you ever experience.

Famous or not, you have married a man of simple tastes. He is someone who has little interest in all the trappings of success. Probably a man of some personal power and confidence, he doesn’t have to prove anything to anyone. He gets bored with the dull conversation of people at the expensive resorts. Most likely he travels to exotic places for his work so that’d be the last thing he’d want to do on his honeymoon. This is a man who is not easily impressed. A down-to-earth, “fair dinkum” bloke.

Perhaps you didn’t realise this. His looks, talent, wealth and confidence blinded you to his essential nature.

If you married him because he had money, you are in for more disappointment. Perhaps you didn’t realise that many wealthy people are not big spenders. In fact, half of them are downright frugal.

Researchers have found, for example, that 49% of millionaires buy second-hand cars. Often there is an inverse relationship between an individual’s net worth and his perceived worth. That means those that have it don’t necessarily flaunt it. The people with the big flashy cars, the mansions and gold jewellery, could easily be deeply in debt whereas the chap in the beat up truck, the Hard Yakka gear and the suburban home could be quietly wealthy. You can assume from your recent honeymoon experience that your husband is more like the latter than the former. Don’t expect first-class or five-star.

You claim you love this man with all your heart. Be honest. If you truly love him, you’d be just as happy snuggled up together in his old campervan.

Struggling in your relationship? North Brisbane Psychologists can help. Book an appointment today!